Help for Parents of Troubled Teens: How to Deal With Anger and Violence

It is hard raising teenagers. It is even harder raising teenagers who are acting out in anger and violence. Teenagers face a number of issues and changes in their lives, and for some, acting out in anger is a way to release the tension and frustration they are dealing with. However, this can be traumatic or difficult for those spending time with them. As a parent, it is a hard situation to manager. You want to discipline them so they will stop, but sometimes discipline can only compound the anger they are feeling. You also want them to know that you love them, and will be there during difficult life moments. Navigating how to handle a teen in this situation can be difficult, so use these tips when moving forward:

Get to the root of what is causing anger and violence

What is causing your teen to act out? Are there external factors that could be leading to their anger? Try having an open conversation with your child. Sometimes, they just need the support and love of a parent to make them come to terms with their misbehavior. Maybe they are dealing with some mental health issues and need someone to talk to. Maybe there are external factors like bullying or teasing at school. This first step is important because you are letting your child know it is OK to feel emotions and confide in you.


Once you get to the root of the problem, they can also see where the anger is coming from. This is the first step to resolving issues. You can’t solve an anger issue without knowing the source of the issue.

Look at therapy options in the area

If your child expresses anger beyond repair in the near future, speak to them about residential mental health facilities for teenagers in your area. There are therapists and mental health professionals who can work with your child on their anger, understand the triggers and provide strategies for dealing with things. A residential program may be a great option because it gives your teenager an immersive therapeutic experience that can alleviate their anger and help them get to know themselves better. Residential therapy is great for teens looking for solutions to many issues. It could save your teenager from future outbreaks and also give them the techniques they need to live a healthy life moving forward.

Make sure to have an open discussion about why you think they would benefit from a residential program. They will most likely want to get better as well and see your point.

Help them find coping mechanisms that work for them

The final step to dealing with teenagers with anger issues is to try and help them find techniques that help them relax and processes their feelings in a healthy and productive way. Maybe they feel that they lack purpose and want to start going to dance classes or sport practices. Sometimes finding a healthy hobby that makes them feel like themselves is the best thing to do.


As a parent, you can teach them how you cope with your emotions. Maybe they need to learn to meditate or to take time for themselves. You need to let them know that it is OK to do things for their mental health that help them cool down and relax in stressful situations. Teach them to breathe instead of becoming violent. It is also important to stay patient with them in this situation. It is a journey that you are on together! Getting angry at them getting angry isn’t going to solve anything. Instead, react with calmness and love.


If your teenager is out of hand, know that there are answers out there. Talk with them and encourage them; there are ways to help you both get a grasp on what they are feeling and how to handle it.


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